Usually I try to avoid being excessively critical of the stupidity I encounter in life every day. I mean, after all, who among us is perfect? Have I ever said or done something stupid? Absolutely! And then there’s the reality that stupidity is just so endemic. If you decided to comment on every instance of stupidity you came across in life, one would have little time for anything else.
But occasionally someone rises to a level of stupidity that tests even my patience, which brings us to the case of Emmett C. Burns, Jr. Mr. Burns, it turns out, is a Democratic delegate in the Maryland legislature. He represents a district in Baltimore County. And last week he decided to speak out against the marriage equality proposal then under consideration in the state House of Delegates.
I try to bite my tongue and avoid questioning the motives of those who oppose marriage equality. But Delegate Burns took things to a whole new level. “Same sex marriage is wrong,” the distinguished gentleman from Baltimore County thundered during the course of debate. “I believe that people who are gay have a right to be that, but the word ‘marriage’ should not be attached.”
Isn’t that enlightening? Gay people have a right to be gay. Wow! That is an impressive level of stupidity, Delegate Burns. Why, good Lord, that’s about as stupid as saying that people who are black have a right to be that. In fact, it’s probably the stupidest single thing I’ve heard so far in 2012; and, to be honest, you’re up against some pretty tough competition there what with Rick Santorum, Newt Gingrich and Mitt Romney running for President of the United States.
Fortunately, Delegate Burns was not sufficiently persuasive and the House of Delegates did approve the marriage equality proposal by a vote of 72 to 67. As of the moment, the measure is awaiting final action in the state Senate.
Meanwhile, in America’s heartland, Bob Morris, a Republican member of the state House of Representatives in Indiana, is fighting to prevent “the destruction of traditional American family values” by refusing to support a resolution celebrating the 100th anniversary of the Girl Scouts.
It’s a lonely fight because Morris is the only member of the House refusing to support the measure. However, based on "a small amount of web-based research," Morris has concluded that the Girl Scouts are a "radicalized organization" that supports abortion and promotes the "homosexual lifestyle." You can read his letter explaining his reasons in more detail here. It speaks for for itself.
I want to take this opportunity to thank Delegate Burns for his candor. It is indeed nice to know what you think, sir. Truth be told, about the only thing I can say in response is this: I believe stupid people have a right to be that, but personally I don’t think they should be allowed to marry and reproduce because it would be a shame to pollute the human gene pool that way.
And as for you, Representative Morris, all I can say is that those Do-si-dos® always struck me as being part of a radical feminist agenda designed to turn America’s young boys into cross-dressing pansies. Thank you for standing up for America, sir!